Above: Ring Stack from Lelya
Is It Weird to Pick Your Own Engagement Ring? Absolutely Not!
When it comes to engagement rings, tradition tells us that the proposer should pick the ring as a surprise. But is that really the best approach? More and more couples are redefining this tradition, opting for a more practical and personal way to choose a ring that truly reflects their style and preferences.
Picking Your Own Ring? You’re Not Alone
The idea that engagement rings must be a surprise is fading fast. More and more couples are going ring shopping together, ensuring that the person wearing the ring gets exactly what they love. Many people choose to design their own rings, hand-pick their stones, or at the very least give their partners clear guidelines.
Tourmaline and Diamond Ring by Madeleine Holloway
Practicality Over Tradition
An engagement ring is a significant investment—both financially and emotionally. Given that it’s something you’ll wear every day, it makes perfect sense to be involved in the selection process. Plenty of individuals prefer choosing their own ring rather than risking getting something they don’t love. Some even shared that they had initially let their partner pick, only to regret it later!
Zia Engagement Ring by Kiya Corrales
Personal Preference Matters
Many individuals have very specific tastes, whether due to personal style, being ‘Type A,’ or even being neurodivergent. For them, having full control over the design is a non-negotiable. Some even go as far as purchasing their own centre stone to guarantee they get the exact ring they want. If you’re the one wearing it, shouldn’t it be something you adore?
Diamond Double Halo by Gemdaia
Balancing Choice with Surprise
For those who love the idea of a surprise but still want a say in their ring, there’s a great middle ground. Many couples visit a jeweller together to explore different styles, discuss ideas, and ensure that the wearer’s preferences are understood. After that, the proposer takes the lead in finalising the design, adding their own touch while keeping the final look a surprise. This approach ensures that the ring aligns with the wearer's style while maintaining the excitement of the proposal.
Picking up a ring from Jodie Gearing
A Sign of a Strong Relationship
Communication is key in any relationship, and discussing ring preferences is just another example of that. Many people see picking their ring as a sign of a healthy partnership. Rather than guessing and stressing, couples can work together to make sure the final choice reflects both personal style and budget. Some even see it as an opportunity to bond and enjoy the shopping process as a couple.
Ignore the Judgement—Do What’s Right for You
Unfortunately, some people still hold onto the belief that engagement rings should always be a surprise. But why should that matter? Times have changed, and traditions evolve. If choosing your own ring makes you happy, then that’s all that matters. As the saying goes, ‘You’re the one who has to wear it—why shouldn’t you love it?’
Salt and Pepper Round Halo by Sarah Hickey
The Proposal Can Still Be Special
For those worried about losing the ‘romance’ factor, there are plenty of ways to keep the proposal exciting. Many couples find that while they know what ring they are getting, they have no idea when or how their partner will pop the question. The surprise element doesn’t have to be the ring—it can be the moment itself!
The Final Word: It’s Your Ring, Your Choice
The overwhelming consensus? Picking your own engagement ring is completely normal—and often the smarter choice. Whether you want to be involved in every step of the process or simply drop a few hints, the most important thing is that you love your ring. After all, you’ll be wearing it for a lifetime!
FAQs
Is it weird to pick out my own engagement ring?
Not at all—it’s actually a smart choice. An engagement ring is something you’ll wear every day, so why leave it to chance when you can make sure it’s exactly what you want?
Is it weird to pick out an engagement ring together?
No, it’s a practical and increasingly popular approach. Many couples go ring shopping together to find the perfect style, ensuring the ring is loved while keeping the proposal itself a surprise.
Is it OK to let your girlfriend pick her engagement ring?
Yes, and many people do. If she has strong preferences, letting her choose the ring guarantees she’ll love it while still allowing you to add a personal touch to the proposal.
Is it OK to buy an engagement ring for yourself?
Why not! Whether it’s a symbol of self-love or just ensuring you get the perfect ring, there’s nothing wrong with making a meaningful purchase for yourself.
